Happy (Belated) Birthday to Me!!

This post is going to be pretty big.  Lots of ground to cover.  I just turned 27 on Tuesday.  So, to start, let's wish me a happy birthday!!  Yay!  The day was excellent.  Started with a massage, then Mom and Grammy and I went and had Indian food, which was super yummy.    Then we went shopping (but I actually didn't spend any money...) and got things so I could cook dinner.  I made a delicious dinner using all our brand new kitchen appliances, and only screwed up a tiny bit (left the casserole under the broiler for too long and sort of burnt the breadcrumbs, but it didn't ruin the dish, so yay!!).  I got to spend the day with people who love me, and whom I love in return, so it was excellent.

I decided back in June that I wanted to make some Resolutions.  Birthday Resolutions, if you will.  Folks like to make New Year's Resolutions, and I sort of did, but I thankfully have a birthday that's about halfway through the year, so if I want to make new resolutions during the course of the year, it's not like I'm doing it right after I make my NYRs, or right before I make them... It's nicely spaced out, and some of my BRs will be sort of additions/improvements to my NYRs.  That being said, they fall under three basic categories:  Physical, Emotional, and Career.  There is some overlap between the three categories, but those seem to be the major groupings under which I've chosen to group my Birthday Resolutions.

Physical:
- I've been sort of lax about going to the gym lately, and have been very lax about eating better... I wouldn't be surprised if I'm back over 250 again.  I've sort of avoided the scale since I know I've been doing so poorly... So, a few of my BRs are about my weight loss issues:
- If I'm in Warrenton for work, I am going to go to the gym.  I've been a float teller in a few different places lately, trying to pick up more hours, so I'm not always in Warrenton.  And I've been VISITING Warrenton a lot lately (I will explain why later in the post), but I've decided that a new resolution is that if I am WORKING in Warrenton, I am either going to go to the WARF (my gym) either before and/or after work.  After all, the WARF is less than 10 minutes from where I work.  No excuse to not work out, really.  JUST DO IT!
- Start counting calories again, and STICK to what I should be consuming.  I need to figure out my Basal Metabolic Rate, so I know just how much my body burns sheerly through being alive every day. And I need to consume that amount or less.  Simple math.  1908.75 apparently, according to http://www.bmi-calculator.net/bmr-calculator/.  So let's say I need to stick to 1900 calories a day.  Sounds good to me.
- Eat more fruits and veggies!  I have a limited number of fruit and veg that I refuse to eat, but I do enjoy eating some things, so I should be stocking up on those, dammit!  Again, JUST DO IT!!!
-EAT OUT WAY LESS.  It'll help both my pocketbook and also my caloric intake.

Emotional:
- Embrace the fact that I am an emotional woman.  I FEEL things.  Quite frequently, and quite strongly.  I shouldn't be afraid of that fact, and I shouldn't get mad at myself for getting emotional about things.  I need to get better about accepting emotions that I used to sort of stigmatize as "bad" emotions.  It's okay to be angry, for example.  I used to try to avoid getting angry, and I think that was a major contributing factor in my depression.  Now, if I get angry, I will let it out!  Shannon ANGRY, SHANNON SMASH!!!  :-)
- Recognize that, although I've been off my antidepressants and mood stabilizers for almost a year now, I might eventually have to go back on them.  This is OKAY.  They were created for a reason, and I am not a weaker person for needing the assistance of chemicals to keep myself from harming myself.  It's okay to have mental illness.  I have a huge, loving, supportive network of people who wish only the best for me, and who are keeping an eye out on me in case I do relapse.  This is a very good thing.  My brain chemistry is not what defines me as a person.
- Dad wants me to see a therapist regularly.  While it's tempting to do it just to appease him, I really don't think I need it at this point in my life.  I'm willing to see one if I ever develop the need to, however.  I think just being more open and communicative about my emotions with the people who care about me will help mitigate the need to see a professional.

Career (there are two levels for these resolutions...current career goals (meaning ones related to the job I currently have) and future career goals (meaning ones related to whatever job I have next):
- I've been with BB&T for almost a year now.  Which means I'm due for a performance review pretty soon.  BEFORE my performance review, however, I need to meet with my boss and talk to her about my concerns and get some feedback.  I don't want to post too much here in case someone from work is reading this blog.  But I do have a sort of game plan in place.
- I like working at BB&T, I really do.  I just desperately need more hours and more money.  Things are tight for me, financially speaking.  It's uncomfortable, and I need to figure out how to fix it.  Hopefully, talking with my boss will help things.  There are a few options available to me.  I can get more hours at my home branch, or I can get supervisor approval to transfer to another position within the bank.  Either one would be great.  I just plain old need more income.
- I need to figure out where I want to be 5 years from now, career wise... Do I see myself still working in banking?  Do I see myself in law school, do I see myself as someone's administrative assistant, do I see myself working for some government agency?  WHAT IN THE HELL AM I GOING TO DO?!?!  I have no clue, and that's scary as hell.  I don't know what the answer IS to the question: "what do you want to do?"  I really don't know.  Maybe I'll be a successful erotic fiction writer.  (Hey, it worked for the lady who wrote 50 Shades...)

In other news, I have retained a lawyer who has drafted a Property Settlement Agreement.  Keith just has to sign it and return it to my lawyer, then I'll sign it, and then she can get started on filing the divorce stuff.  Gah, it's so FREAKING EXPENSIVE!!!!!!!  Rar.

In other, OTHER news: I've got a new man in my life.  He's ridiculously amazing.  And our chemistry together is all the more fascinating when you consider the fact that when he asked me out, we knew practically nothing except each other's names, and he knew that I worked at the bank.  Turns out we have a lot in common and get along very, very well.  I'm rather stupidly happy with him and how we fit together.  His name's Matt, and I've got some pretty strong feelings for him, considering we've been together less than a month.  But hey, sometimes things just work out stupidly well in a short amount of time.  My parents are an excellent example of this.  They got married 6 weeks after they met, and have been together for over 31 years.  I'm just going to enjoy it for as long as it lasts... Which I hope is for a very, VERY long time.

I think I've written enough here for now.  I shall update again soon, hopefully letting you know that I've been sticking to my birthday resolutions!!!  Thank you again for the time you take to read all this, and thanks for any comments you leave either here or on my Facebook page.  My readers are AWESOME!!!